divorcedlondon

It never ceases to amaze me how many women become fans after reading my blogs.

You would think as the internet’s (former) number one cheating husband, women and especially the married ones, would think I’m terrible. You would be mistaken.

Apparently, many, many women enjoy my writing and they like to read what I write while flicking their beans.

I’m starting to wonder if I’ve indirectly responsible for more women having orgasms as a result of my blogs than as a result of directly having sex with me!

I only wish I could be personally responsible for all that cumming! I’m a hands-on kind of guy and to me; the best thing about sex is making a woman cum and cum and cum and cum…

You get the idea.

I had a long lunch with Doug, my media guy last week and we were discussing this very point.

Doug reckons that because my “fetish” (god, I hate that word!) is a woman’s orgasm and my favourite activity is cunnilingus, women respond to me. He says even though they shouldn’t; they can’t help themselves!

I don’t know if that’s true or not, but if the emails I receive are anything to go by, he might have a very valid point. If women out there want to worship me and everything I stand for; I’m certainly not going to try to discourage them!

I knew when I set out, I would end up being some sort of a hero for other horny married guys and I am, but to think that I’m an object of lust and desire for lots of hot, random women…well, I never really expected that!

In some ways it’s quite frustrating, because there’s a lot of hot, horny pussy out there that I could be having, except I can’t.

Why?

Because my blogs, while a blessing in many ways, are also a curse!

Could you imagine if I actually arranged to meet someone and they turned out to be another tabloid reporter? Picture my picture in a newspaper; I can’t think of anything more indiscreet! I have way too much to lose, especially now!

If you want to blame someone, don’t blame me! Instead blame that tabloid hack, who set a trap and nearly gave me a heart attack!

Not only did she nearly unmask me and trash my secret internet identity, but she’s responsible for preventing me from getting loads of NSA action with my many female fans!

So if you’re one of those hot, horny women who dreams of a taste of the “full discreetlondon treatment”, keep dreaming! If that tabloid reporter hadn’t nearly screwed me over, I might be screwing you, literally, right now!

Doug thinks all this is funny, that the one thing that would attract more women to me than ever before is also the reason why I can’t meet them.

I don’t see the humorous side of this myself. At least there are still plenty of women around who’ve never heard of discreetlondon, though if Doug is successful, that will change soon too.

That’s why I had lunch with Doug, to discuss my media future! Doug’s convinced that things will start moving for us soon. He’s actually done a bit more work than I realised.

Doug has outlined my entire first blog as a first step to writing the scripts. He’s still convinced a tv series is the way to go, but if it was up to me, I’d prefer to see a book come first.

Doug’s thinking seems sound though; he says if we can get a series produced, we could launch a book off the back of it.

As an unknown writer, Doug thinks my chances of publication are slim, even though my story is already a proven winner here online. He says, “old style” media doesn’t really look too kindly on “new media”.

If that’s true, they can’t be very smart! I don’t care if they’re smart or not, just as long as they want to make me a shed-load of cash!

I met Doug for lunch at his favourite restaurant in Soho, this American place he likes. Doug says it’s full of media-types and if that’s true, they all seemed like twats to me!

The restaurant specialises in wood-smoked barbequed meat and it was very good. Actually, it was especially good, since Doug treated me to the meal! Result!

Doug works in the media, but I found out he’s not pulling down the same kind of money I am. He probably only makes about twenty percent of what I will this year. I thought people who work in the media were rich! And Doug works in television, so I was surprised to learn this.

I don’t really understand exactly what he does, but so much of the media is like that and just beyond me. I know he works overnights and he says he does that by choice.

That part I really don’t get! If I had to work at night, when would I have my discreet fun? Doug doesn’t have any discreet fun, he lives with some woman, but I haven’t met her yet.

Doug was pushing me again to put something in writing regarding the development of my story. He says it would make sense to have some sort of contract between us, outlining the specific terms.

I’m just not comfortable with doing this since I don’t know what the terms should even be. Doug says we could have it all drawn up by a solicitor, but I just don’t know.

There’s some sense to having a formal arrangement; I see that, but it makes me nervous. I’d hate to be giving away my profits for no reason. And what’s a fair share for someone who’s only re-writing what I’ve already written? I’ve done all the really hard work already!

Living my life has been the really hard work; writing about it has been comparatively easy!

Doug talked a lot about structure and how he sees a discreetlondon television series. He talked about pacing, character development; plot structure and how he would adapt my first blog into a ten-part “darkly comic drama”.

Originally he was talking about turning it into a sitcom, which I was dead set against! There’s nothing funny about my life! Maybe now he’s sees that, because he’s not pushing as much for the comedy element any more.

What I found fascinating is that he actually pitched the first episode to me, in great detail.

It was surreal, sitting in this restaurant having someone else describe real events from my life as if it was a tv show. He even showed me that, while dramatic, there’s room for humour and he made me laugh a couple of times.

It seems like he wants to stick closely to my story, or as Doug put it, he wants to “remain faithful to the source material”, which of course is my first blog.

I’m looking forward to seeing the first draft of the first script, or “pilot” as Doug called it. He’s going to want my input, feedback and most importantly, my approval, before showing it to anyone else!

I really want to get this show on the road! I don’t want another year to go by with me sitting here not making money from my blogs!

Things are actually going better with Doug now, it seems like he’s finally pulled his finger out. He says he’ll be able to put more time into the project for the next couple of months!

We talked about this blog as well, the one you are reading right now. Doug has been trying to coach me on my writing and I hope you all notice a difference! He’s given me a few tips and pointers; he’s even got me using a Thesaurus!

Doug says that my writing style has matured since I started the first blog. Perhaps its just practise, or maybe I’m just more confident. I don’t know. It’s good to have him give me this feedback, since I don’t really have anyone else with a critical eye looking over my shoulder!

Maybe I’m just easy, because I got a free meal out of him, but I’m feeling much more positive about the prospect of something actually happening! Thousands of internet fans can’t be wrong! I don’t want to let any of you down!

I had the baby with me this weekend for the first time in bloody ages!

My wife dropped her off on Friday night and it seemed like she couldn’t wait to leave her with me. I’m sure being a new mum is stressful, but she really seemed desperate to drop her off and go; perhaps she had some sort of social plans. Who knows?

Since I hadn’t seen my daughter in a while, I was shocked to see how much she’d grown since the last time. They grow so fast! She was a proper angel all weekend and didn’t give me a spot of trouble. I just love her so much!

And I finally was able to give her the Christmas gifts I’ve had waiting here for her for weeks. She’s far too young to understand, but it made me feel good knowing I was able to finally play Santa for her.

My daughter will want for nothing, as long as I have anything to do with it!

My wife did leave me a gift, which she said was actually from my daughter. She described it as just a token. I opened it after my wife left and nearly burst out in tears when I saw what is was.

It’s a framed photo of my little girl, the first one she’d given me. There were also a couple of wallet-sized prints in there as well.

That framed photo is now in a special spot of prominence on my desk at work! I’m a very proud father!

I saw Bob a couple of times last week. He’s spending a lot of time with his new special lady, which has limited his availability. I haven’t met her yet but she sounds ultra-posh; her ex-husband was quite wealthy, which left her well off after the divorce. I’m sure if it continues, I’ll eventually get to meet her.

I tried to get Bob to go our lapdance club but he wasn’t up for it. He didn’t say, but I’m wondering if he’s trying to keep his nose clean because of this new woman. As if anyone in that particular lapdancing club would ever tell!

We ended up going out for drinks locally in Paddington. There’s not much to report, both nights were just quiet drinks in quiet pubs. I hope he hasn’t sworn off the lapdance clubs for good!

There’s one person who hasn’t, I mean besides me and that’s the MD of my new firm. I took him there just before I got the job and twice now he’s asked when I’ll be taking him back!

And get this; he’s convinced it’s a private club! He thinks he needs me to return, as he was “my guest”! I haven’t set him straight yet and maybe I won’t. I think a return engagement may be in my future soon!

Last week at work was dull again; it seems the world isn’t back to normal in the first week of the New Year. I went in every day anyway, though I can’t say I did very much apart from a few longish lunches, including my meeting with Doug.

Terry, my assistant is a real gem, though I still can’t believe my secretary is a guy! He knows how to create the illusion of activity; when the MD popped into my office for a chat, Terry knew exactly how to maintain the façade of productivity! I’m going to have to give him a pay rise as soon as I can!

I had that meeting with the human resources manager as well and he took me through the company’s process and procedure for making staff appointments. They’re very formal about these things; surprisingly so, considering how informal the firm is otherwise.

I’ll have to interview both candidates officially, with someone from HR present. I’ll need to ask them both similar questions and judge their responses accordingly.

Of course, DL has his own way of doing things and I’ve got some thoughts on what criteria I’ll be using to make this rather important management decision. Maybe I’ll just toss a coin!

“Ginny” and “Jenny” were both around last week with “Ginny” continuing to be a bit shy and awkward around me, while “Jenny’s” flirtatious approach continues to distract, if not impress.

I’ve never had to make an appointment like this and I really want to make the right decision! I also want a piece of “Jenny”, although I know it would be a big mistake. I’ve got till the middle of the month and I’m going to take my time with this one.

Part of me would love to get my hands on “Ginny” as well, especially if it’s true that she’s a virgin. How lucky would she be if her first time included a giant portion of the full discreetlondon treatment! I’d probably spoil her for all the other guys by setting the bar that high on her first time!

The truth is, my new office is just full to the brim with women and I want them all! I sit at my desk, pretending to have something to do, while I am really imagining what it would be like to have sex with them.

I’m serious, I think I’ve probably had a go with all of them already in my mind and I don’t even know most of their names yet! It’s funny how vivid my imagination can be!

Like there is this one woman, she must be late forties or early fifties, works in HR or accounts, I’m not really sure, but I’ve spied her in the corridors a few times.

For a woman of her age, she is extremely attractive, quite thin, with blondish-grey hair. She’s a bit matronly actually, but in a subtly sexy way. Now, I wouldn’t try it on with her in real life, no way, but just to relieve the boredom, I have pictured what it would be like to seduce her.

One word describes this fantasy: grateful. She’s grateful for the special attention and really makes the most of this chance to relive her younger, sexually active days.

No woman I’ve seen at work has escaped my fertile imagination; I picture what it’s like to get hot and sweaty with every single one of them! I’ve even nipped off to the loo a couple of times to take my detailed fantasies to their natural conclusion.

Yes, I mean I’ve been wanking myself senseless there a fair bit!

And you know, I’m no different from most guys. We’re all always thinking about sex, probably with YOU!

I just don’t have that much to do, which as a boss and manager, and I mean any boss or manager, is often the case. I do try to create the illusion of productivity and I’m very lucky that my personal assistant understands this game too.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m very lucky to be in this new job, I just expected, I don’t know, more work. This department pretty much runs itself; so perhaps I just need to redefine my role in some way, get more involved.

What am I crazy? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

Besides the senior account executive post appointment, I’ve got to attend a major sales meeting next week. The creative director, or CD as I call him, is making a big pitch to seriously big corporate client and I’m going to tag along. He’s such a trendy twat; it should be a right laugh seeing him in action.

I’m looking forward to picking up some more corporate wank-speak from him. It seems every time I chat with him, I catch some new business term that’s profoundly wanky. Creatives, eh?

By far the most exciting thing I did last week was take that new website I mentioned for a test drive!

As well as ordering Erectalis (formerly Apcalis, the generic form of Cialas), I booked my first prossie through them. On both counts, the experience was very rewarding!

To do either of these things, you must first register with the website and become a member. This sort of thing makes me quite nervous, but I didn’t really have a choice. Sometimes, the benefits outweigh the risks!

Once you register, you can place an order for Erectalis, but even this is not straightforward. First you have to buy credits, which I guess is a bit like virtual online money. One credit equals one pound and I’m guessing it’s just some sort of loophole that allows them to get away with selling sex the way they do.

I ordered twenty, 20mg pills for fifty-seven quid, which works out less than three quid per dose. That’s a bit cheaper than Elvis! Result!

Of course, I was a bit nervous that the pills would never turn up, but two days later, a plain brown envelope arrived, with my name and address hand-written on the label. It was the goods I ordered, as described.

The service seemed fast and reasonably priced, but what about the quality?

Well, there was no point in trying one on my own, so I went back to the same website to find a willing companion for a couple of hours of discreet fun.

As I’ve explained, this particular website is like all my discreet dreams coming true in one place online! As well as selling various penis pills, they also have quite a comprehensive listing of independent escorts working in London; literally hundreds of them!

I’ve got a bad habit of spending hours checking out women online before I make a booking, because I have such a difficult time making a choice. Well, this website was no exception to that; actually I think I spent the longest I ever have, just window-shopping before making my selection!

The choices and range of services available is mind-boggling. Some of the offerings are even new to me and I thought I’d done it all!

Would you believe I even found identical twin sisters! I’m not making this up, actual, honest-to-God, twins! They didn’t come cheap, but they were available for home visits and would even put on a show for you! Well, they say incest is best!

Actually, I don’t get going with twins. It’s like you’re paying twice as much for a double portion of the exact same thing. If I’m going to spring for the two-girl special, I want a bit of variety!

For the most part, the prices these prossies were listing seemed very reasonable and there’s a lot of competition out there for the pervy pound.

Many of the women offered discounts for longer bookings; making a two hour session much more affordable. And the best bit, most of them mentioned that you are paying for their time, not their services, so you could cum as much as you wanted! Now that’s a great deal!

It really did take me ages to finally make my selection and this time, I went in a totally different direction. I booked a thirty-nine year old woman who claimed she had the body of a twenty-five year old. From her photos, I wouldn’t argue the point; she looked hot!

She charged £250 for two hours, would do all the things I’d enjoy and I could cum as much as I wanted! It sounded ideal!

I filled in the online booking form and left only enough details for her to phone me back on my work mobile. It’s the only one I have at the moment, though if I have time, I’m going to pick up a second, secret, pay-as-you-go phone this week. I didn’t give my real name either.

The whore phoned me back within fifteen minutes, which I thought was a good response time. She was softly spoken and pleasant on the telephone, but required quite a bit of detail from me before agreeing to visit.

I’d worked myself up quite a bit about meeting this particular woman, so I decided to provide whatever she needed. That list included my real name as it appears on my landline listing, my landline number and obviously my address. She said she would verify my details with directory enquiries.

I’m ex-directory and explained this to her, but she said it really didn’t matter as they would confirm my details anyway. Can that be right? It’s probably worth me ringing up and asking myself.

My guess is that she just wanted the additional security and making it sound official meant I was more likely to provide actual details. Who knows for sure?

She rang off then phoned me back about five minutes later on the landline and confirmed that she would be with me within ninety minutes. So far, so good.

I jumped in the shower, shaved and put on my favourite charcoal grey robe. I laid out a couple of fat lines of charlie then knocked back a double measure of whiskey. This was going to be good!

I popped an Erectalis from that new batch as well. As I waited for the hooker to arrive, I was nervous that the pills might not work; that they could be fakes, but thankfully that was not the case. These were the real deal!

Nearly bang on time, my door buzzer went off and I checked the video entry phone. I confirmed it was my expected guest and buzzed her inside. She was up the lift and at my door in no time.

She was even hotter than her photos, which didn’t show her face. In person, she was very attractive and indeed did look younger than her stated age. I invited her inside and offered to take her coat, which she removed, revealing quite a simple, yet sexy black dress. She was wearing black heels as well, with what appeared to be stockings. She looked quite elegant to me.

Her hair was on the longer side and dyed flame-red, which suited her pale skin and features. I ushered her into the living room and offered her a seat on the sofa.

I asked her if she would like something to drink and she asked for something soft, so I got her a large glass of orange juice with some ice. I poured myself another whiskey, then returned to the lounge.

I joined her on the sofa and offered to take care of business. With that out of the way, we could relax somewhat. As she was reticent to discuss my requirements on the telephone, she asked me what I was interested in for my session.

I told her I wanted a “GFE” which stands for “girl friend experience” and is a term associated with the escort trade. She knew exactly what I wanted.

After a few moments, “Kitty” cuddled up to me and purred softly against my neck before kissing it. From there, her lips met mine in a very deep and passionate French kiss.

I suggested we enjoy my hot tub together and she was enthusiastic in her response. I went off to start filling it and when I returned, “Kitty” had removed her dress, revealing a black strapless bra, matching thong, suspender belt and stockings. She was standing by the sofa, almost posing for me and if I had a camera, I should have taken a photo! She was picture of seductive beauty!

I took her by her neatly manicured hand and led her into the master bathroom, where the Jacuzzi was nearly ready. I turned on the pump while she stripped off completely, then we both climbed into the whirlpool bath.

She snuggled up to me tightly, wrapping her arms around me; this “Kitty” didn’t mind the water! She snogged me some more and as she did, reached down and grasped my now throbbing cock.

The Erectalis was more than doing the trick! Result!

She wanked me gently while kissing me; and it was very nice indeed. Then I stood up and sat on the edge of the bath, my erection pointing up at the ceiling. “Kitty” got on her knees in front of me and swallowed my length in one practised go.

She deep throated me like a porn-star and it seemed like only seconds before I filled her mouth with my love juice. I never take that long the first time!

I slipped back in the hot tub to catch my breath; “Kitty” was again next to me, still playing with my cock. It wasn’t still fully hard, but it didn’t go completely soft either. I suggested we towel off and move to the bed. She didn’t disagree.

Once I was mostly dry, I left “Kitty” to finish drying herself. I went back to the kitchen for another dose of coke and another whiskey. I topped up her orange juice and brought it back to the bedroom.

“Kitty” was already sprawled out on the bed, wrapped only in a towel. She was so hot that I knew I had to taste her. I dove between her legs and undid the towel, revealing her very neatly trimmed bush.

I parted her legs and set about doing my favourite thing. She was very responsive and in no time I found the right rhythm to get her really going. She came hard a few times from my special attention. I’m good!

From there, I ended up fucking her three times; once doggie, once with me on top and finally with her on top. I used my personal favourite condoms, those Durex Performas and with each fuck, I lasted a little longer!

“Kitty” ended up staying for over two hours, she didn’t rush at all and when it was time to go, she handled it without it feeling like she was clock watching. It was a great punt overall with four orgasms for me.

I would book her again, though variety is important to me as well. Overall the experience was nearly perfect and I think I’ve found a new source for playmates in this new website. It really was a lucky discovery!

I started this entry over the weekend, while my daughter was with me, but I’ve been finishing it off here at work on my PowerBook. No one here of course knows that I’m the famous blogger, discreetlondon and never will as long as I have anything to do with it!

That’s one plus to having fuck-all to do here in the office, I’ll have more time to dedicate to my writing!

And before I go, I just wanted to thank all of you who send their kind regards and good wishes to me following my unfortunate incident on New Year’s Eve.

My head is fine now and the swelling is gone completely. The only thing still dented is my pride. It was a silly thing to do and I won’t be doing anything like that ever again!

If it really stays this slow for me this week, I’ll try to post something else before the weekend, but as always, no promises!